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Seriously people, I’m done with hats!

I remember my mother leaving for my cousin Jean’s wedding when I was about 4 of 5 years old.  She had on a white broad brimmed hat that was covered with lace, it was elegant, it was pretty, and as always, she looked great.

I also remember saying to her, much, much later,  that I missed the days when women dressed UP, wore hats and gloves, and were stylish.  I thought it was a simpler and more cultured time.

Her response, “I’m glad we’re done with all that nonsense!”

I was stunned.

But, you know, as always, she’s right.

The recent Royal Wedding of Prince William and Catherine Middleton was quite a spectacular.  It was the British Monarchy at it’s “best of show”, it was inspiring, magical, and enchanting.

But those hats, SUCK!

We’ll start with this one:


Yes, yes, I know I mentioned this last week, but give me a break!  I’m not talking about the blue one, or the one the soldier is wearing, but the hideous one in the middle worn by Princess Eugenie of York.

She’s the younger daughter of Prince Andrew, Duke of York and his naughty ex-wife, Sarah Ferguson.

She’s a self described shy girl, a college student, and a youth cancer volunteer.  So, I’m sure she’s a pretty neat kid.  But someone needs to take her aside and say, “WTF?”.  That hat is A to the W to FUL!  And, “What’s with the racoon eye make-UP?”

Eugenie’s hat was one of 36 made by Phillip Treacy for wedding invitees. Thank goodness he didn’t have any more time.  I’ve seen other Treacy creations when forced to watch runway/next fashion crap on TLC, and frankly, the guy’s a genius.  But, he’s not an artist!  Afterall, he’s convinced the world he has talent and that his hats are attractive, stylish, and have style.

But, they’re not.  They’re beyond UGLY, they’re Fugly!

The Octopus looking disaster on Eugenie’s head is called a fascinator. 

It’s not fascinating, it’s just plain stupid.

And there were more.

Victoria Posh Spice Beckham designed her own dress and hat.

David and Not So Posh!

Frankly, Rosalyn Carter did better in 1978 with her home-made ball gown!

Here are some of the hats, and some of my thoughts!

Queen of Denmark!!!!!

The Queen of Denmark’s money would be better spent at the dentist than at the milliner!

1940 called, it wants its hat back!

Will’s Aunt Anne, the Princess Royal should quit shopping in garage sales!

Princess Anne's daughter, Zara

Zara Phillips, the daughter of Princess Anne could have served chips if the service ran too long, but at least this one IS a hat.

Should have spent the money on a face lift!

This is Queen Sophia of Spain, let’s get a face lift before we get any more hats.  Must be that hot Spanish Sun.


Will’s Aunt Sophie, the Duchess of Wessex could do better.

Really Ugly

Ok, these two are just stupid.

The corsage was just too darn big for the dress!

Shouldn’t that corsage be on her dress instead of her head?


This one could pass for a hat.

Classic Belgian Beauty

At least the Belgian Princess can match her colors, and knows what a real hat is.

Camilla saves the day!

And who would have thought that Camilla, everybody’s punching bag, would save the day with a real hat?

Linda Ellerbee said it best, “Styles, like everything else, change. Style doesn’t.”

I say, “Hats off!”

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