Archive for the ‘ Social Tips ’ Category

Is Nude Rude?

Some people are so UPtight!

A small Lutheran Kansas college golf team wanted to do something different on team picture day, but their creative minds have landed them in agua caliente!  Their nude team photo got them suspended for the next three tournaments.

When did the Lutherans get so stuffy?

“We all have our shirts off, our shorts to ankles and we are holding golf clubs in front covering up our, um, male parts,” said team captain Jack Hiscock.

Is nude really so rude?

Yes, we can see that, and I did not make that name UP!

Mr. Hiscock (I can’t type that without laughing) said the team was just trying to copy a similar picture taken by the UCLA team.

Once again, it’s all Hollywood’s fault, darn that California!

An apparently UPtight Bethany College golf coach and athletic director, Jon Daniels, says that he was “shocked” when he saw the picture.

“My stomach dropped, and I thought, ‘This can’t be good'”.

Shocked?

Really?

Shocked?

There may be outrage in Lindsborg, Kansas, the home of the “Swedes”, but the rest of the world is having a good laugh.

Well, at least I am!

The team of course thinks the suspensions are a “bit harsh”.  But, I’m sure that’s nothing compared to the harsh treatment the moron team member who posted it on Facebook is getting!

Can you say, “Dumbass!”?

Mr. Hiscock…again laughter…said that the shoot started off normal enough, but then one thing led to another.  Well, I suppose that’s how it usually goes.  One guy drops trou, then the rest follow? 

I mean, really, if all your friends jumped off a cliff, would you?

At any rate, the picture looks as though it was taken from the tee while the team stood on the green, and they did use clubs to cover UP their johnsons.

I just feel sorry for the poor guy who had to use the putter!

Have a great Saturday!

Unapproachable You!

So, you’re in a club, lookin’ your best (in your mind) and you wonder why the hot guy across the room who’s lookin’ at ya won’t come over and chat  you UP?  You wonder, “Is it me?”.  Well, it’s not you, it’s him.  No seriously, it’s him.  Well, maybe a little bit you.

There are are plenty of reasons.

You are surrouned by too many friends.  The guy may be a guy, but he’s no fool.  He knows the minute he walks away the gaggle of geese you rode in with will rate him, and I mean all of him from 1 to 10. 

You’re drunk tipsy blotto smashed drinking too much!  No one likes a sloppy drunk!  If there’s an empty Petron bottle and 40 limes on the table, you might just be too far gone for him to get to know you.  Know when to say no!

You’re too hot – seriously, you’re too hot.  No, I mean it, your too hot.  Really, you’re just too pretty.  He’s sure you’ll shut him down, and his ego can’t take it.  But soon he’ll realize ugly guys usually end UP with the best looking women!  And he’ll come around.

You’re too sloppy-  It’s  happy hour, you’re coming from work, the blouse is a little un-tucked, and you’re make-UP needs a retouch.  Hit the ladies’ room and get pretty again.  He’ll come around.

There is a happy medium ya know!

Debbie Downer – Smile.  Daddy spent all that money on the Ortho, show those pearly whites and look like you’re havin’ a good time.  No one wants to date a drag – and if he’s into that, you probably won’t be able to get him anyway.  As soon as he realizes he’s in the wrong club, he’ll take off!

There’s another guy there – I don’t care if he’s your hairdresser, he’s still another guy!

Someone went to Jared!  If you’re wearing a four carat engagement ring, he’s not comin’ around, and you shouldn’t be there anyway, you little tramp.  After all, He went to Jared!

You seem busy-  again, it’s happy hour, leave the laptop in the car, mute the cell phone, and take that pen from behind your ear.  Now would be a good time to lose the reading glasses that you’re using as a head band.  Again, get pretty!

You’re too hard to catch – frenetic and all – A slow walk is a sexy walk.  You may have to pee like a race-horse, but you don’t have to get too the loo like one.  Slow that gallop down and give him a look when you walk by.  And wash your hands, he may introduce himself to you on your way back!

You’re a wall-flower – don’t just sit there, do something!

Your picture and phone number are on the Men’s Room Wall!  Ok, that might make him come over after all!