…I have mentioned before that this time change crap gets on my nerves.

Spring forward, fall back, my butt.

Pick a time and stick with it!

However, THIS weekend is the change date, and Daylight Savings Time ends.

We have to Fall Back.

So, imagine my chagrin when I set my clocks back LAST weekend thinking we were still on the Last Sunday in October method.

I hit the gym Sunday AM at 8 o’clock according to my car clock, which I’d changed the night before.  I couldn’t figure why people were leaving at 8:05.

Ron, one of the completely ripped fat free gym rats who gives me tips on what to do said, “You’re late this morning.”

And then it hit me!

It was the next week.

It’s pretty bad when you have to name yourself  ”Ass of the Week!”

Quit playing with the dates!

So, this weekend, make sure you set your clocks back an hour at 2 AM Sunday morning.

Now, don’t go setting them back any earlier, that wouldn’t be fair, wait until exactly 2 AM Sunday morning.  I’ll be sleeping, I’ve already got it done!

Buzz words.

I hate them.

But, I’ll admit, it’s kinda fun to look back on the buzz words of the day and remember.

After all, I have spent most of my adult life in Corporate America.

I must confess, I didn’t really pay attention to buzz words until the 1980s.  After divestiture, or the break UP of Ma Bell, buzz words seemed to come to the forefront.

Take Wing – any of you Bell heads remember that one?

I still don’t know what it meant, I just remember that when they replaced the word processing system with a new one, the boss said, “Well, the took Wang!”…I don’t think the two were connected.

In the 80s, there were words like “relentless pursuit”.  Relentless pursuit of perfection, relentless pursuit of excellence, but in reality, it was the relentless pursuit of cash!

The 90s brought “passion”.  I was asked in an interview for a promotion, “What’s your passion?”  Frankly, I thought that a tad personal, but I answered nonetheless.

And I got the job!

What’s your passion, greed is good, robust, breaking barriers, thinking outside the box…I mean really, every time I left the cubicle or office as it would later on become, I was thinking outside the box!

World class!

Have you seen the rest of the world?

Do we really want to be world class?

Change the culture.  That was huge at the Phone Phactory back in the day.  Everyone wanted to Change the Culture.  Didn’t Judge Green do that?

I had a boss once who interjected, “at the end of the day” into nearly every conversation.  Frankly, at the end of the day, I just wanted to get the hell away from her!

Multitasking – that was big in the 70s, and guess what…it doesn’t work.  If you doing two things, one of them is going to suffer!  You can’t really multi-task and have relentless pursuit of perfection.  Gosh, who do you think I am, Sybil?

Proactive – a zit medication.

Synergy – c’mon! 

Integrated or integration – didn’t the Civil Rights Act fix all that?

Leverage, the big idea, resolve, branding, putting UP silos!

What are we, farmers?

Breaking down barriers is just a nice way of saying “give me what I want!”

Value added – OMG, that was huge in the 80s and 90s, and I confess…I used it.  I took it as a philosophy.  If I wasn’t adding value to something by doing what I was doing, frankly, I shouldn’t have been doing it!  But the phrase lost its lustre.

Which is another one, lost its lustre.  So polish it!

Emails, memos, notes, post-its  – they all have buzz words. 

Here’s a robust idea, business it UP, use proper English in a business email once in while! 

Now that I think about it, wouldn’t it be nice if this went viral?

Authorities in Atlanta, i.e. the Po-Po, say the number of Waffle House robberies in the past two weeks is now 18.

OK, this crap’s gotta stop!

Seriously, I’m a at Waffle House EVERYDAY!

Everyday.

Last Friday, the Waffle House at U.S. 78 and Rockbridge Road near Stone Mountain in Gwinnett was robbed at gunpoint, according to Gwinnett police spokesman Cpl. Edwin Ritter.

This is about seven miles from my house, thankfully, there are forty-leven other WHs before that one.

Reports show the spree of robberies also includes cases in Auburn, Ala. and LaGrange, Ga.

Grogan says the suspects tend to strike between 2 a.m. and 5 a.m., typically the slowest times at the restaurants, and the most interesting I might add, when they will place a to-go order.  He said that when the cash register is opened, a gun comes out.

Now, I’ve been in thousands of Waffle Houses, and I’m quite sure the fire-arms of the robbing scum trash aren’t the only heat in the place.

At least, not at 2 in the morning!

Waffle House officials are offering a $2,500 reward for the arrest and conviction of two men with a taste for Redneck Lattes and robbing the restaurants across metro Atlanta.

$2500!  Are they kidding?  That’s outrageous!  This is serious business!  UP the ante boys, and catch these butt-wipes!  I don’t want to have to dig my “carry permit” out!

The “ESC” button on my computer at work is a total fraud.

I pushed it a thousand times all day long, and everytime I opened my eyes, I was still there.

Damn that Bill Gates!