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I quit having them early on in elementary school.

I didn’t have a lot of friends, and a few imaginary ones would have been nice, but once you start making UP friends to talk about, and telling wonderful and even tragic stories about them, and the truth comes out, well, you’re branded a liar for life.

So, like I said, early on in grade school, I had real friends.  Not many, but they were real.

This did not happen with Manti Te’o.

Not only did he have imaginary friends, he had an imaginary girlfriend.


Most psychologists would call that ‘self-abuse’.  And if he never met her, is she really his girlfriend?  Or, is she the girl on the other end of the phone sex line?

This entire story has been very confusing.  We are now supposed to believe that he’s been the victim of a hoax.


I have a twitter account, a Facebook account, I’m even on linkedin, and I look at it often enough to think that if someone was tweeting, Facebooking, and linking about me, well, I’d know.

Supposedly Te’o and his ‘girlfriend’ met via twitter.  Well, isn’t that romantic? She had a car wreck, almost died, got better, came down with leukemia, and died.

All of this tragedy inspired him to lead the Fighting Irish of Notre Dame to the BCS playoff game, where they were smoked by the Crimson Tide, I might add.

So the question remains, if he didn’t know about the hoax, how could her story be inspiring to him?


Is anyone else as confused as I am?

And, isn’t Manti a super-stud, super-star football player?  Aren’t there any slutty cheerleaders at ND that would love to be his main squeeze?

Why does he need a beard an imaginary girlfriend?

I realize now there are more questions in this post than answers, and I usually like to impart information to the universe full of people few who read my posts, but today, I’m confused.

Very confused.

And, I’m a little angry.  Now, I’ll admit, I’m not a Notre Dame fan, and I may be biased, but the last time I checked, leukemia is a very unpleasant way to die.  It breaks hearts, scars families, and causes loss.  And anyone using it in a hoax of any kind, whether his or that of some one else…well, it’s just wrong.  Sinful, if you will.

Either way, a victim of a hoax or a bold liar using fake tragedy and death by a horrid disease to gain fame, -and I don’t care if I lose an imaginary friend or two over this-  makes Manti Te’o Redneck Latte Ravings’ Ass of The Week.

At least I think so.

Don’t you?

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