Archive for February, 2010

Happy Birthday…

ELIZABETH TAYLOR

…Liz Taylor…She’s 78 today.

You all know I’m a huge fan.  So this is a holiday for me!

She’s gone from the winsome child star to the most beautiful woman in Hollywood and an award winning actress to “the Grande Dame” of Tinseltown.  With stellar Oscar winning performances in “Butterfield 8” and “Who’s Afraid of Virginia Wolfe”, her classic portrayal of the girl who wants to ride in “National Velvet” and the vamp of the Nile, “Cleopatra”, Elizabeth Taylor has charmed audiences for over 60 years.   Her philantrophic work has raised millions for several causes, including AIDS research. 

Her art and jewelry collections continue to be the envy of many collectors and her loans to museums are coveted.

She’s truly a Grande Dame!

Regardless of her ‘trashed through the tabloids’ life, Liz has thrilled us all.   She’s living proof that a life of excess can rob one of beauty, health, and viablilty, but she…remains a National Treasure.

Happy Birthday Dame Elizabeth!

…Sequins?

We’re talking about Figure Skaters here.

Recently, on FB, the father of a friend said “All those sequins on men, it’s just creepy!”

Well, I don’t wear them often, but if I could lift a woman over my head by one hand while skating on one foot, I don’t think I’d take any crap about it if I did.

I’m amazed at the ‘athleticism’ of the figure skaters – both men and women.

FISHNET AND SEQUINS!! NICE!

The lifts, the jumps, the staying UP!

FLY GIRL!

Wow, how do they do it.

I remember when I went to Ohio State, (gosh, what a week that was!), I was “set-UP” on a date with a girl named Darlene.

An aside here, Darlene is oddly enough one of my favorite names.  Darlene was on the Mickey Mouse Club when I was a kid, she was cute, and I at four or five years old was “in love with her”.  You guys can have your Annette Funicello, I wanted Darlene!  I had a doll, (GET OVER IT!) that I carried around, and guess what…her name was Darlene.

MY DARLENE!

But, back to the date.  One of my sadistic fraternity brothers decided we should go ice skating.  Back in the day, and it may still happen now, the students could pay 2 or 3 bucks and skate all night at St. Johns Arena.

ME – never been skating.

SHE – channeling Peggy Flemming!

Oh, yes, it was the date from h-e-double hockey sticks!

It’s a tad difficult to hold someone’s hand when you can’t let go of the rail.  It’s a tad difficult to stand UP on ice when you have never had skates on before IN YOUR LIFE!

Now, I could roller skate, and everyone told me there was no difference.

That is, what’s the word I’m lookin’ for?  BULL!

I fell, once or twice, a few times, occasionally, three or four hundred times.

Once when I fell, a Wayne Gretzky wannabe decided it would be fun to skate over my semi-frozen fingers – well there goes 12 years of Piano lessons!

And my frat brother, and “friend” could not stop laughing; his date and mine skated on the other end of the rink.

After about an eternity hour and a half of this misery, Darlene suggested we get something to eat.

Great idea, so off we go to some now forgotten Pizza Place (oh that we’d gone to the Blue Dube, at least I remember that place) for a slice of pie.

That’s when I realized I’d chipped a tooth!

So, dear friend, and Anna and Em’s dad, creepy or not – If you can lift a woman over your head with one hand while skating on one foot, in skin-tight pants in front of 12 judges, 10,000 spectators, and 40 million Televeison viewers…wear your sequins!

GO SEQUINS GO!

You’ll not get any crap from me!!

Well, we actually called it the Five and Ten Cent store, but it’s one and the same.

It was in Germantown, it’s not there anylonger, and it was owend and operated by one of the nicest guys I’ve ever known.

Mr. Seelbrede.  I don’t know his first name, he was always Mr.  as was everyone back then. 

They carried everything you needed, from fabric to greeting cards to toys, hula hoops, and candy; they sold candy corn and peanuts mixed, it’s still my favorite and may have been the beginning of that addiction.  They even had wagons.  They weren’t a dime though.

It was the precursor of the Dollar Store.  Only much better.  It was a local store, operated by a local man, who knew the community, it’s needs, and it’s small wants.  He was a really nice man, and had a beautiful daughter who grew UP to be Miss USA in 1981, Kim Seelbrede.  She recently told me (via Facebook) her dad worried about kids stealing.  I was surprised to find out that they did back then.  We were way to afraid to steal.   She said “his greatest joy was clowning and connecting with his customers”, and it showed!

Kim Seelbrede

Mr. Seelbrede was special. 

He called me Wally.

For a few years I had no idea why.  I just thought he figured my  name was Wally, and I never corrected him.  Which is odd, as I usually corrected everyone on everything back then.  Somethings never change.

I was “outspoken”.

Finally, one day, I asked him “Why?”

He said, “Well, you look like Mr. Peepers.”

And amazingly, I did.

Now Mr. Peepers was on TV.  So, as a seven year old looking like a star was fine with me, it didn’t matter that he was reduced to selling laundry detergent.

As you may remember, I’ve often claimed that I was switched at birth, and my real parents are rich Hollywood types who could spoil me materially.  Alas, Mother insists not.

But really, take a look at this and tell me what you think?

Me:

FOURTH GRADE

Mr. Peepers:

Mr. Peepers

Since my my motto has always been “If there’s a will, I wanna be in it!”…

…I need to run now, gotta’ go call the lawyer.

If Only We Were As Wise…

…as King Solomon.

You remember him, the wise Israeli King ,who when given a choice asked for wisdom rather than power, riches, or fame.

The son of King David, you know, the shepherd boy who slew the Giant Goliath and defeated the Philistines over and over and over again. 

Solomon, the King and Judge who knew that if he suggested cutting the baby in half, the one the two  harlots were fighting over, the real mother would plead for it’s life and the pretend one would not.

Someone's a lyin' here, I can just feel it!

You know, Solomon of the Bible.  First Kings, Chapter Four to be exact.

Yes, he really existed, he really was that wise, and he really was that rich and powerful. 

He took over the throne in about 937 BC (that’s Before Christ, I don’t use BCE, which is before common era…why leave Jesus out completely?), when his father died.

Now Solomon was the “love child” of David and Bathsheba, it’s not just an Opera, it’s a true story.  David lusted after Bathsheba as she was a skinny dippin’ in her roof-top pool.  Her hubby Uriah was in battle, where Dave should have been, and so hormones a ragin’, Dave put in for a booty call.  When he found out Bathsheba was “in the family way” and that Uriah would know it wasn’t his, he tried to trick Uriah into thinking it was by calling him home thinking he’d have a little bedroom time with the honey.  When that didn’t work, he put him at the front of the battle, where he was sure to be a casualty.

So, after Uriah’s death and Hero’s funeral, David added Bathsheba to his stable of wives, and Solomon became a Prince of Israel.   And later King.

Historians have for years tried to tell us that David and Solomon were “largely mythical and that there was no strong government to speak of in that era.”  But the Bible for hundreds of years has told us that they were real, and that their was a kingdom, and that it was that great.

Now, an Archaeologist has found what she sees a “proof” for the Bible in an ancient wall in Jerusalem.

Really Old Wall

Proof for the Bible…really, you need proof?

Apparently a wall under the Dome of the Rock dates back 3,000 years, the time of Solomon, and it supports the “biblical narrative” about the era. 

Whoopie!

This wall is deep beneath the Temple Herod built and the Romans destroyed around 70-71 BC.  The Temple of Solomon was destroyed by Babylonian Thugs when Israel went into captivity back in the day.  Herod rebuilt, Rome destroyed, and they just kept building new stuff on top of it, so finding things is, let’s just say, a chore!

Nevertheless, the style, building skill, and materials used in the wall support the fact that The Davidic and Solomonic Kingdoms were “actually as strong and powerful as the Bible says they were.”  Imagine that!

Seems every one in the Archaeological community is stunned by this finding.

Again, Woopie!

Eliat Mazar, said archaelolgist, says, “It means that at that time, the 10th century, in Jerusalem there was a regime capable of carrying out such construction.”  Ms. Mazar (no relation to Debbie, who was voted off Dancing With The Stars way too early) claims her dig was the first to complete excavation and the first to turn up strong evidence for the wall’s age.

Said evidence:  a large number of pottery shards, which archaeologists often use to figure out the age of findings.

Aren Maeir who teaches archaelolgy at Bar Ilan U near Tel Aviv, says that he as “yet to see evidence that the fortifications are as old a Mazar claims. ”  He says there are remains from the 10th century in Jerusalem, but proof of a strong centralized kingdom remains “tenuous”.  And he added, “There’s a kernel of historicity in the story of King David.”

“This is pertinent and annoying because?”, you ask.

I don’t need science to prove the Bible for me, it’s nice and all.  But I accepted that a long time ago.  If it’s in there, it happened.

So, dig, don’t dig, date, don’t date, I really don’t care.  But since your science is proving God right…don’t treat me like an idiot because I been believing it for a long, long time.

Ok, note to Aren and Eliat.  God called,  He left a message:  “Told Ya SO!”, and He asked that you re-read …

1 Kings 4:1:
So king Solomon was king over all Israel.

You might wanna read the rest, it’s pretty interesting.