Red Neck Latte: 

noun –

Waffle House Coffee to go, filled to the top of the “waffle” with coffee, 10 sweet n’ lows, and filled to the top of the cup with REAL milk. (Real milk is WHOLE MILK.)

I will not pay $4.00 for a frickin’ cup of coffee.  Really, words like venti, Grande, steamed foam, mocha latte frappe, etc. did not come into the American Lexicon (unless you were in Spanish or Italian class) ‘til Starbucks came up with the (notedly brilliant) market plan to re-caffeinate Americans.  My hat’s off to them, really it is.  Frankly, I wish I’d thought of it. 

Rule of Paul Law # 1:  Don’t mess with my coffee.  Seriously folks, do NOT “EFF” with my coffee.  Coffee is coffee.  It’s not foamy, it’s not iced, it’s not steamed, foamed, whipped, or anything else.  It’s coffee.  Some purists like it black.  Some like it with sugar only, some milk or cream only, some with “fake” sugar.  Me loves me coffee.  Really, (and I’m hoping my cardiologist isn’t reading this), but me ‘hearts’ me coffee, or as I prefer to call it, my Red Neck Latte.  I know, it’s kinda like adding class to NASCAR, painting a smile on the Mona Lisa and all that, but morning isn’t morning without my Redneck Latte.  I’m hoping from now on, yours won’t be either.

So, dear reader, this blog is here for you to start your morning with a laugh and a cup o’ Joe, with or without milk, sugar, sweet n’ low, splenda, equal (just like Cher does) or yes, even iced, join me, laugh with me, or at me.  Let me know how you feel.